Self Portrait
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Well aren't you just special?
Or are you like me... just hoping to get the bathroom cleaned in case good Old St. Nick may be feeling his age, and need to potty before he climbs back into his sled and hits another house. I wonder if he'll snoop in my medicine cabinet like my old card club friends used to do? Well, it's not as though I actually invited him. He'll just have to gossip about me when he gets back to the North Pole.
Tis soon the season to be jolly, so gear up Kmart shoppers and get ready for the celebration. Are you one of those people who already have their Christmas shopping done, and wrapped?
Yes, I love this time of year. The multicolored leaves are just so beautiful drifting into my rain gutters and onto my lawn. A friend of mine, Martha Wannabe Stewart runs outside every time another leaf drops from one of her trees. She picks it up and deposits it in her special decorative leaf bag.
If you are like Mrs. Wannabe Stewart, and are giftedly organized, you probably have time to check out my efforts here because your house is cleaned spotless and you have already replaced your Halloween decorations with your Thanksgiving wreaths and centerpieces.
She has her Christmas shopping done, wrapped, and paid for!!! Well, leaves make excellent mulch. I'll bet my lawn will be much healthier than anyone elses next spring.
You've already started planning your Christmas decorations, which won't be any problem, because you carefully wrapped each and every one of them in tissue paper, and carefully placed them in labeled boxes when you took your live tree down, the day after Christmas, last year.
Your cookies are baked and in the freezer, just waiting for those special little gatherings you've planned. You will be entertaining your family, friends, and all those people who invited you to cocktail parties in the past year. You are ready to sit back and actually enjoy the holidays. Smugness does not become you.
If you are like me, you've just polished off the last of the Halloween candy that you didn't give out, because you were stuck working. You've got Hungry Man Turkey TV Dinners already planned for Thanksgiving. Your family is expecting money gifts for Christmas because they know you never shop. You've basically accepted the fact that that special downhome Christmas just isn't happening again this year. You also may have time to peruse these pages, because, heck, may as well surf, there's no time to really get anything done anyway. Am I right? or Am I right?
So instead of decorating my house, heck why lie, instead of CLEANING my house, I'm sitting here bleary eyed, trying to decorate the internet with some of my ideas and stories. I was in the restaurant business for twelve years and bet me folks, I've got some stories. All the names have been changed to protect the guilty.
Having been in the restaurant business for over twelve years, I have developed two expressions, "Of course I wouldn't mind." "I'd love to run my fat little legs off for you." As you can see from my self portrait, my fat little legs have been worn down to the nubs. I did enjoy working in the hospitality and service industry and many of our patrons became wonderful friends.
Two years past "burnout" our restauant was sold. God Bless The New Owner. I now have a life!
Vote And I'll Come
Clean Your House. Not!
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